On A Happier Note [Recipes]

I love food.

I've given up smoking, I don't have money for medicinal cannabis, and I've been very much alone.

Pretty sure I have a serious oral fixation of some kind on top of it, but I digress (sugar free lollipops and popsicles have helped).

When I can't seem to summon the willpower to get into things that usually make me feel better: music, doodles, watching/psychoanalyzing TV shows and movies - some of the best few weeks I had in the last year were spent watching episodes of Star Trek Next Generation (thanks PlutoTV) and a series on YouTube called The Take - I don't have a lot left to comfort me besides my cat, sleeping, and food.

I try to do research (ie read Wikipedia) and pay attention to the local/national/world/universe news but it generally stresses me out and I end up feeling pretty powerless.

So I'm truly grateful I was able to get food stamps this year, plus there was additional COVID relief, which has given me more money to eat than I usually have under regular circumstances.

I'm used to spending about $30 a week, or about $120 a month.

For several jobs, I've often found myself eating once a day - having no food at home and getting food at or on the way to work - feeling I needed the energy most to get those tasks done. I'd walk to work as fast as I could, out of hunger. It became a strange kind of incentive to get there as quickly as possible. Even when I didn't want to go, getting to work was more than a paycheck and some kind of long term survival obligation - it also meant I got to eat.

I honestly thought I might starve to death last summer.

EBT has given me $211 a month with a $95 COVID boost mid-month.

I've changed my diet several times, trying to find the perfect combination of food I could get over and over to last as long as possible while feeling satisfied without gaining weight/bloating issues (...looking at you, my beloved extra sharp white cheddar cheese...I don't know if it's because I'll eat the whole thing in a couple days, or if it's the cheese itself, but I can see my body physically change shape after buying this, which is concerning. Takes a couple weeks to go back "down". Bread/spaghetti and rice & beans have also been difficulties for me, despite being inexpensive enough to want to buy in bulk. I prefer potatoes, but buying fresh only lasts about a week and the frozen comes pre-coated in oil so they can end up being fattening when I add cheese and vegetarian meatballs etc.)

I've been isolated in quarantine for over a year and I try to get delivery as inoften (which I just learned is not actually a word, but fuck it) as possible. On one hand I'm grateful at least two places take EBT for online delivery orders, but I wish everywhere did as it really forces to you to buy from only those two places - one of which charges $20 and the other is free, so really you only have one choice. You also lose out on a lot of deals you'd get in store - but what can you do when trying to avoid the virus? Hope the delivery workers are getting hazard pay at the very least - they should all be issued carts to help move items by the way - they've been essential to my survival - even when they've set my groceries down in a pile of shit that was in front of the door (only happened once - but still ugh ick).

Must admit I've still not found a perfect budget, and I started running out of stamps before the month ends, but my life food-wise is still a thousand times better than it's been in nearly 10 years. I didn't always have unlimited access to food, but having a meal plan in college was probably the most I've ever eaten in my life.

Now the concern is just that it won't last forever, and I have no idea what I'm gonna do once assistance stops.

I was a vegetarian between 11th grade (about 2006/2007) and sometime around May of 2012.

I became a vegetarian again in December 2019.

Seeing the progress of vegetarian options available has been a lot of fun and super delicious.

Way better than things were 7ish years ago.

I wish I had never stopped - like I lost something of myself for the last 7 or so years.

I also feel better being a veggie, and prefer it - but don't worry, I won't shove that down your throat.

I'm not vegan because I get so much out of eating cheese and honey and I don't want to get sick if I accidentally end up ingesting something meat based since the majority of people do still eat meat. They cook those impossible burgers at Burger King on the same grill as the regular burgers, for example. There can be fish oil and gelatin in a lot of stuff. I didn't eat out much before (outside of the couple years I spent only eating from the dollar menu at McD's) and I have no idea when I'll ever eat out again, but still. Might give in and want a pizza at some point or something. I tend to get wafts of food smells from the surrounding area where I live, and it's easier to just imagine it's a vegetarian version of bacon or fried chicken or whatever. I also believe in by-products because a lot of these domesticated animals can't survive in any kind of "wild" environment - you wouldn't be able to just let them go. Farms and places that produce the by-products still should be giving the animals the best life they possibly can, however. I don't think it's "too soft" to wonder how some humans end up being so inhumane. I became a vegetarian in 11th grade after spending three days watching a documentary on the inside operations of factory farming. It's truly horrible. Never let yourself numb out so much that you let cruelty like that become the norm. Even if you can't stop it, at least try to fight the apathy within yourself.

The following recipes are all veggie friendly, but you could sub things easily as you like.

I've also tried to cut extra sugar out of my diet.

Holy god does everything still have so. much. salt. in it though.

My diet right now usually consists of:

• protein bars that contain 20 grams of protein and zero sugar (I've tried making my own protein powder "super nutrient" shakes since the soylent ones can get pricey, but both the blenders I bought broke and it became even more expensive trying to add fruit etc.)
• mozzarella sticks (I did just calculate that I've been having way more protein than I thought I was  - which is funny because usually people wonder if you can get enough protein as a vegetarian, and here I've been having almost too much...gotta find something else to substitute for that oral fixation though...I want to try to make ginger lollipops)
• olives
• pickles
• jalapenos
• ginger (gingermints)
• garlic
• mio energy stuff that comes in a little squirt bottle
• acai - if and when I can get it (has omega 3s and just tastes good - chia seeds for omega 3s too, but they can be kind of annoying - avocados are my favorite but they're expensive and I've gotten too many bad ones through grocery delivery)
• Vitamins - I've got a complete vitamin that I try to take every other day (multigrain cheerios can be a substitute if you only have EBT), a calcium/magnesium/zinc for when I run out of cheese, and I've been taking biotin with surprisingly good results (my nails have never not curved downward once they reach the ends of my fingertips before)
• I've tried buying herbs and spices that are supposed to have antimicrobial properties (cloves, thyme, cinnamon, garlic, anise, ginger etc.) 

See: 

Antibacterial and Antifungal Activities in Spices: https://www.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/pmc/articles/PMC5486105/

Common Spices and Plants with Antimicrobial and Therapeutic Properties: https://www2.hawaii.edu/~johnb/micro/m140/syllabus/week/handouts/m140.8.3.html

Some of these concoctions might be a little strange, but they're also based on the budget I've had.

I thought they were tasty, cheap, health conscious - if not always perfectly healthy - and maybe someone else will enjoy them to their own tastes, too.

***

Birds Nest (Vegetarian Meatballs, French Fries, and Cheese)

Ingredients:

• Vegetarian Meatballs - my favorite are the Gardein brand
• French Fries - frozen - steak cut works best for the "birds nest" effect
• Cheese - any kind will do - the meltier the better (mozzarella, edam, gouda, swiss)
• Add spices if you like: jalapenos, garlic, peppers and onions

Cooking:

1) Oven set at about 450 degrees

2) Cook the veggie meatball and fries for about 10 minutes and turn over

3) Crisscross the fries in a star pattern and put the veggie meatball in the middle

4) Add cheese and spices on top

5) Cook for 10 to 15 more mintues until everything is crispy and holds together

If done right, comes out looking like a birds nest with an egg - fun and delicious

Eat with ketchup and hot sauce

Cheesy Crispy Veggie Ramen/Udon/Lo Mein

Ingredients:

• Noodles (ramen, udon, lo mein)
• Mixed veggies - frozen (can be whatever type - I love this mix that includes baby corn & water chestnuts along with green beans, sliced carrots, and broccoli - but usually just get the regular big bag of peas, carrots, corn, green beans)
• Jalapenos - can get the sliced nacho style, but the pickled can comes with carrots and onions as well and tends to be cheaper
• Garlic - powder or the Dorot frozen cubes - I've found the powder to be cheaper and more flavorful
• I buy olives and mix them with the jalapeno and garlic, which leaves me with a jar of spicy juice once I've eaten all the olives
• Ginger - buy it whole, shave the skin with a spoon, slice it up, and just put it in the freezer - ginger makes everything better
• Mozzarella (string cheese) - sounds so odd but I promise this was delicious - babybel edam cheese or any other melty cheese (gouda, swiss) would probably be good too
• Ramen packet of spices (chili flavor)

Cooking:

1) Bring water to a boil

2) Add frozen veggies, jalapenos/olive and garlic juice, frozen ginger

3) When boiling again, add maybe 1/3 of a ramen chili powder packet and noodles but for a very limited amount of time - for ramen and udon, I turn the burner off and let them just cook themselves - by the time it's cooled down enough to eat, they're usually perfect. The lo mein noodles take a little longer.

4) You can stop there if you just want soup, but this extra step really stepped things up for me: turn the oven on to about 300 degrees. Drain the noodles and veggies. Lay on a baking sheet. Add mozzarella (string cheese sticks). Kind of turn the veggies and noodles over onto the cheese as it melts. Cook until edges are crispy and the cheese is melty, adding extra garlic. Oh my god this was so good.

Sweet Sticky Ginger Bites

Ingredients:

• Ginger - buy it whole, shave the skin with a spoon, slice it up, and just put it in the freezer - ginger makes everything better
• Cappuccino mix - this was just what I had on hand that was sugary (I've cut most sugar out of my diet and try to get sugar free stuff now) - I think honey would have been good too, though using the cappuccino mix should have given it an added boost of caffeine - also have some hazelnut syrup I'll probably experiment with next time
• Five Spices Blend - cinnamon, fennel, cloves, anise, white pepper

Cooking:

1) Bring water to a boil

2) Add frozen ginger, cappuccino mix (or whatever sweetener), and spices

3) Boil for a few minutes and turn down to a simmer - I did this for about 45 minutes to an hour

4) Drain the mixture - I saved the liquid in a large coffee carafe and let it cool, then poured it into an ice cube tray - been experimenting with putting into an acai drink mix, but might be best to turn into popsicles - someone online suggested putting them in lemonade

5) Oven at 200 degrees - I sprinkled a little extra cappuccino mix and five spice blend onto the pan and dumped the ginger bits, kind of rolling them around in the powder. Baked for a little over an hour. Came out sticky and kind of caramelized while still fresh and "wet" in the center of the bigger pieces. This is not crystallized ginger, but the best I've had was Reed's brand crystallized ginger - the bag says "nuggets of baby ginger root" - if I could figure out how to get it that texture, that'd be awesome. Maybe cut the ginger into squares? They also probably used a dehydrator. Anyway, my version was still good (to me) though, and I ate it all pretty quickly. Left a really nice spicy sensation in my mouth.

Mini Waffle "Baked" Brie/Edam/Mozzarella Pocket

Ingredients:

• Pancake Mix - I prefer Krusteaz which has egg and milk in it and comes in a huge bag for pretty cheap (I've found bread does unhappy things to my guts, though, so I limit this)
• Cheese - brie can be expensive - as can camembert, babybel (edam), and even the extra sharp white cheddar (which isn't as melty, but I love it) - but mozzerella sticks seem to be a fairly cheap and melty alternative - mix melty cheeses if you can (gouda, swiss, etc.)
• Fruit/Jam/Preserves - can be anything or any flavor you like, really

I got a mini waffle maker for about $10 at target a couple years ago - it works fairly well

If you've had actual baked brie before, I think you get the idea - I'd like to try this with flaky biscuit/pastry dough and see what happens

Cooking:

1) Mix pancake mix and water - I prefer a thicker consistency, almost "sticky" dough

2) Pour a layer of mix on the waffle maker - you're working on a very small scale here, so go with less so it doesn't overflow and you end up with mix and goo wasted all over your counter. 

3) Add slices or cheese or one babybel round (not a lot)

4) Cover in a layer of jam

5) Add the final layer of pancake mix and close the lid. Comes out as a little pocket of delicious when done right.

 

Lemon Pepper Ch'kn

I haven't actually made this yet, but when I ate meat my favorite thing to make was lemon pepper chicken - so I'm interested in finding the best vegetarian ch'kn substitute and seeing if I can recreate the goodness

Ingredients:

• Lemon - a real one or the lemon juice in bottle works too
• Pepper - easy enough
• Ch'kn - lots of options in this area - gotta experiment to find the best one for that juicy consistancy

Cooking:

1) I used to just pour lemon and pepper on chicken and cook it on the stove, maybe putting it in the oven for extra crispyness - I liked it when the edges got slightly burned but the middle was juicy - that's it really. Could eat just that all day.

Avocado/Lemon/Salt

This is the simplest thing in the world, but it makes my heart sing.

Ingredients:

• Avocado - they say to pick a soft one but I've found it's easier to check if it's ripe by whether there are brown spots when you pick off the little stem nub
• Lemon - a real one or the lemon juice in bottle works too
• Salt - duh

Cooking:

1) Slice avocado

2) Cover in lemon

3) Sprinkle with Salt

4) Devour it like a goddess

I'll add more to this later but I've been working on it for hours and I just want to do something else

I think those are the most tasty things I've made semi-recently at any rate

Pretty much just add cheese, jalapeno, and/or ginger to everything and it'll be amazing in my book lol

(Except the avocados with lemon and salt, of course. Those are perfect as is.)

Oh wait, yeah, how could I forget?!

Dr. Frankenstein's Monster Vegetarian Sandwich 

I haven't made this in forever, but they were awesome.

Ingredients:

• Sourdough bread slice
• Rye bread slice
• Hummus
• Egg Salad
• Lettuce
• Pickes
• Sprouts
• Potato Chips
• Mustard (spicy)

Cooking:

1) Spread the egg salad on the sourdough side

2) Spread the hummus on the rye side

3) Lettuce, chips, pickles, (spicy) mustard, and sprouts in the middle

4) Cut diagonally or down the middle, I don't care

4) Eat the grandmotherfucker